Sumbitch!: Pie In Chronological Order Across the United States

November 20, 2005

Pie In Chronological Order Across the United States

What is the best pie? I was the first to answer this question, about a month ago on a non-broadcast radio station (the answer is the comments after Country Pie. This was one of the worst shows in most ways but definitely the best in accuracy of pie commentary):

I asked everybody who was on the internet what their favorite pie was:

Middletown, Connecticut: [19:52] LuasNehoc: sweet potatoe pie is really good
McLean, Virginia: [19:52] gfvaulthp: i like all pie but mince meat
Washington, DC Reporter 1[19:52] hteb09: maybe apple? blueberry?
Madison, Wisconsin: [19:52] JimmyBhardcore: apple
Madison, Wisconsin: [19:53] JimmyBhardcore: without a doubt
Washington, DC: [19:53] fizzcobiker69: the mathematical formula
Madison, Wisconsin: [19:53] J suave157: i'd say it's between apple and pumpkin
Cambridge, Massachusetts: [19:53] astrochicken0: probably apple is the best
McClean, Virginia: [19:53] gfvaulthp: blackberry might be the best
Madison, Wisconsin: [19:53] J suave157: maybe blueberry
Washington, DC: [19:54] fizzcobiker69: nah sike apple
Cambridge, Massachusetts: [19:54] astrochicken0: but i like blueberry a little more
Washington, DC:[19:54] fizzcobiker69: nah pumpkin
New York City, New York: [19:54] OldShizer: i mean pecan pie is pretty sweet
Washington, DC: [19:54] fizzcobiker69: nah actually pizza
Cambridge, Massachusetts: [19:54] astrochicken0: but definitely fruit pies are superior to non-fruit pies
New York City, New York: [19:55] OldShizer: but if you're going to get into idiom
New York City, New York: [19:55] OldShizer: maybethat POON
King's Point, New York: [20:02] nm4000: hmmm... cow
Chestnut Hill, Massachusetts [20:02] bipothemo: pumpkin
Hyde Park, New York: [20:02] cgate787: personally i like apple pie
Madison, Wisconsin:[20:03] Chicopac05: apple in my opinion
King's Point, New York: [20:03] nm4000: pumpkin or apple, can't decide
Winston-Salem, North Carolina: [20:04] turker202: puntang pie
King's Point, New York: [20:05] nm4000: apple with Ice Cream, pumpikin with whipped crea
Washington DC 1: (8:07 by phone) "Also Lemon Meringue is really good"
Well it all goes to show that only one person knows the right pies, which may explain the disaster that occured here on Thanksgiving.

They were giving away a Thanksgiving meal in our basement, with mashed potatoes, stuffing, sweet potatoes, gravy, and most importantly, turkey. For an added bonus, there were over twenty pies.

I grabbed my backpack, hoping to nab at least one pecan pie, and headed on down.

As people were going up the stairs, I looked at the pie slices they had in hand: pumpkin, pumpkin, pumpkin, apple, apple, pumpkin, blueberry, pumpkin. This was cause for some concern, but I assumed perhaps the dumb fucks had simply chosen the wrong pie.

When I got downstairs, the situation was worse than I could imagine. Not only were the pies too well guarded to take more than a slice of, but there was no pecan pie.

Twenty motherfucking pies and they left out the best one.

I quickly proceeded to the only logical conclusion: that because pecan would never be left out in the south, it was the fault of the Northern nature of this city, and all its fucking Yanks. Not that the South is the promised land, but they know their pies, and up here, it was a sad day for pie.

Posted by icejew at November 20, 2005 07:56 PM

Comments

Who else is home tomorrow (Monday)?

Posted by: Cortez at November 20, 2005 11:45 PM

yeah, it is pecan.

Posted by: farbs at November 21, 2005 02:11 AM

nonsense.

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if you like apples so much why don't you go smoke weed out of one

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