Are these hillbillies and yokels really going to be the next generation of doctors and psychologists? Is this stiff bastard going to be the suit that owns me in ten years? Oh man, this is what I get for not applying myself back in high school. Getting shafted by the suckers. I have nothing against hillbillies or collared fuckholes, I’m sure they’re all fine people, but it boggles me that they’re going to be much “better” than me in the socio-economic-power structure thing in a couple years. I’m pulling two examples from across the plane of world here; the first being earlier this morning, I was sitting against one of them indoor brick walls waiting for class to begin, and the hick with poor complexion was talking loudly to a cute girl with one those hoarse southern accents, they were talking about their pre-med requirements and volunteering in child psychology and talking about hundreds of credits, whatever that means. I’m there, against the brick, probably showing off some ass crack, in my United Airlines hoodie with the ripped right pocket, probably nodding my head to the beat of ‘Capitol Radio’, probably smelling awful, looking worse, there’s no more noxious sight then a large unkempt man trying to sit cross legged-y; there was a reason I was always the pilgrim or lumberjack in the elementary school reenactment of Thanksgiving, this brother over here, ain’t sitting Indian style, plus I’ve always thought flannel was bad ass. So back to this pre-med hillbillies. Man, that yokel must be a lot smarter than me, therefore he’s going to be more successful than me, he’ll become one of those “cool” psychologists, the one that all the teenage girls look forward to seeing, he’ll tell them horizontal = call for help, vertical cuts = getting business done, the room will be full of books, with a fine Oriental rug that he bargained the fucker down on, he’ll one of those things where there’s like five balls and one ball hits the other balls, you know, the fuckin’, the fuckin’ perpetual motion machine or benoit ball thing that they always have in offices. Fuckin’ A. Am I confusing psychology with psychiatry? What’s the difference? Joy Division to New Order? Maybe that hillbilly fuck is better suited for that job. I don’t want to learn the truths of the brain, I just want to confuse the fuck out of myself and get some General Tso’s chicken once in a while.
When I was up at Columbia, hanging with the DC mafia there, we got ourselves in a conversation that spanned from Freud to the Flaming Lips, with the question of does neuroscience have the capacity to, in time, chemically determine every action of the human mind. Before disintegrated in to a whiskey-fueled rendition ‘Baba O’ Reily’, one the Eli’s up there stated that there was conscience decision to not want to understand the depths of human decision and wonder whether or not they’re chemically derived (hence the Flaming Lips) and if human feelings can not be broken down to just chemicals in the mind. Man, I sure felt like an Ivy League student then. If it wasn’t for my MC5 shirt with the coffee stains that look urine stains, I could really fit in over at that cinderblock building, until they caught me stealing forks and spoons, which is inevitable. But I could still hang out on their quad, doing Bill Murray quotes on the steps; “For whatever reasons, Ray, call it fate. Call it luck. Call it ka-arma. I believe that everything happens for a reason. I believe that we were destined to get thrown out of this dump”.
RAY
For what purpose?
PETER
To go into business for ourselves.
Offers RAY a drink. RAY drinks.
RAY
This ecto-containment system that Spengler and I have in mind is going to require a load of bread to capitalize. Where are we going to get the money?
PETER
I don't know.
drinks
I don't know.
Outside Manhattan City Bank
The three come out of the bank. Fanfare.
PETER
You're never going to regret this, Ray!
RAY
My parents left me that house! I was born there!
PETER
You're not going to lose the house. Everybody has three mortgages nowadays.
RAY
But at nineteen percent! You didn't even bargain with the guy!
EGON
flashing a calculator
Ray, for your information, the interest rate alone for the first five years comes to $95,000.
Well I fucking enjoy myself. I sure can pass time well alone, hell that’s all I do down here. Maybe I’ll make up my own language, hit ‘em like Sigur Ros, with a fetus on the cover.
But those kids were hitting some deep stuff, and I can’t even find the soft spot in my skull. Makes me wonder whether I’m really as interested in psychology as sometimes I tell myself I am, I think I’m down for the mystery, for the surprise, I’m more of a man for thrift stores and Boggle and fucking damn curry, you don’t know what curry can do to ya. I don’t know whatever the truth is, but I gues I’m content with making fun Asians and saying ‘fuck’ more times than I have to, spilling chili all over my sleeves. I still don’t what I’m in it for, air hockey? Cheap hoochie? Square dancing? I dunno.
“So when you go to sleep at night, some writers write all night, ten thousand words of truth, then they drink themselves to death upon finding it...”
I can’t wait to go jail and then have a jailbreak.
I’d get some coffee and some pecan pie.
Be the best damn pecan pie ever.
Even better than that old Mama’s bourbon pecan pie.
Let’s take it all.
you are not a man, sitting, boy.. you are a boy, sitting, man.
fucking spending time... just write, at least you will have something to look back upon, a tangiabale. objecto.
Posted by: dcohen at November 5, 2004 03:24 PMI read that whole entry as if you were speaking in a southern accent. I don't know the exact words in the beginning that made me think so but I heard your voice in my head and it was southern. And it stayed that way. It was crazy.
There's book smart and there's smart smart. One tastes like rank fried chicken and the other tastes like saucy chicken curry. I see you've had a taste of each.
Posted by: Lindsay at November 5, 2004 07:18 PMThat premed stuff is bullshit. I will spend my time in college playing Grand Theft Auto, failing tests, chatting with wacky British professors, taking only classes that are fun, and experiencing the fucking joy of learning, and I will do all this because I don't have to answer to anyone about why I took the classes I did, or why my grades were what they were, or why I didn't spend all my free time in some lameass lab; because I'm not going to fucking medical school. This premed shit is a result of the same ultimately shortsighted mentality that led so many of the people now at Ivy League schools to waste the better part of their high school years; they were only kidding themselves when they said they'd relax in college. In the end, this hillbilly of yours will just be some douchebag in an office, while you will be a cool guy who has an interesting job and good stories to tell. And your children will not hate you.
Posted by: Cortez at November 6, 2004 03:50 AMYou're telling it pretty straight, Cortez. So you're giving Harvard the proverbial money shot?
Posted by: JRuss at November 6, 2004 01:26 PMIn taking arabic, I think I've been able to find a nice balance between the practical and the "learningisfun" aspects of college life. On the one hand, I get to memorize an entirely new alphabet and phonlogical rule system (which is awesome and fun)and then, at the end of these four (possibly five years) at whereever I am/end up---I'll have a skill that makes me marketable, much like that of a doctor's, which will help me cure not individual but societal ills, inshallah.
Posted by: dizardo at November 6, 2004 05:23 PMIt seems to me that a pre-med track is a pretty rewarding one. And though I have barely got my feet wet, I'm already enjoying myself. I prefer the immediate satisfaction of lab work and experimentation, and the prospect for creative license in a discipline that is relevant. I don't know what kind of motivation one would qualify that as being - in any way one chooses to look at it - but it may be different under the liberal arts curriculum. At any rate, I'm enjoying myself, and I disregard those whom are on pre-med tracks and are unhappy or are not satisfied... I don't know where I am going, but I am terribly confused about what you all mean by the things you say about what the college experience should be - that is after dismissing the your experiences in deviation from emperical reasoning. So wait, is anyone we know planning on concentrating on some form of neuroscience?
Posted by: Pablo at November 6, 2004 08:04 PMShut up, doc.
Posted by: JRuss at November 6, 2004 08:14 PMcollege is all about the word "empirical"
Posted by: fsadsad at November 7, 2004 11:32 AMlet me tell you a story: many moons ago (maybe 2) we'z talkin' to this moderately drunk fellow who'z a sophomore. this fellow's an english major type, direckin' a one-ack play up in this piece, and we, insecure newly-arrived freshmen that we were (are), are talkin' to him bout school things. and he's holdin' forth, enjoyin' himself, and he's like:
Are there any engineering kids here? Good. Can I just say engineers are fucking retarded? I hate fucking engineers. You know why? I was in my intensive general chemistry class the other day, and all the engineering kids wanna know is, "what am i supposed to get out of this?" and i want to say, "what you're supposed to get out of this is SCIENCE IS AWESOME. who gives a shit if its useful."
wise words. wise words, from a wise (drunken) man. over the next four years, i would like my learnin to be as not practical and not useful as possible, because when the fuck else will you be able to do that shit. i will tell you when: never.
there are signs up around campus advertising an "MCAT Debate" for pre-med students, in which representatives from Kaplan, Princenton Review, &c, will "debate" about which organization offers the best test-prep for the MCAT. i can't even count the ways in which this disgusts me.
cortez: fuck that larry guy. i am voting for you for president of harvard.
Posted by: farbs at November 7, 2004 03:19 PMthe difference: psychaiatrists prescribe medication, psychologists don't.
Posted by: random person at November 8, 2004 11:54 PMthis is because of a more important distinction, that psychiatrists are MDs and psychologists are not.
Posted by: farbs at November 9, 2004 12:43 AMTrue. My old grandpappy has been writing books on psychology for years, but he ain't no expert with a scalpel.
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Posted by: DHI at November 9, 2004 04:38 PMDebate is something I must quit, man. All we do is sit around in a room with a fat lady and pretend to do work on a computer, and that is shit.
Yeah, I can't talk on my own blog anymore, so I complain about stuff elsewhere.
Posted by: DHI at November 9, 2004 06:38 PMOne of my AIs (an asian woman) for music theory is a piano major -- she was basically cast out of her family because she decided not to pursue the medical field. A lot of people/families value money and security rather than happiness and passion. My word to all of you is: What ever it is you love doing, try fucking hard to do it the rest of your life.
Posted by: Alo at November 10, 2004 08:03 PMLet me make this clear to you right now, JRussell, so that you don't get insecure about this shit again:
You are very smart.
Do you think that dumbass girl at Harvard with a last name that sounds like Curtis's first name is actually smarter than you? She has "sucess" because she doesn't know what real sucess is, nobody likes her, nobody talks about how funny she is, if she wrote a blog nobody would look forward to the entries, she'll never have an original writing style that everyone loves.
Just think about your friends, such as Mr West, Mr Cohen, Mr Goldfarb, Mr Morales, the list goes on, all whom are very smart people both in school-shit terms and otherwise, and who don't talk down to you when you talk, you connect with what they're saying because you have a similar level of intellectual understanding.
For an example of people still at Wilson, the two other people in my grade who admire you and talk about you like they understand you are Eisenbrey and Bernstein, both very smart people, and Bernstein doesn't get enough credit because a lot of people only notice his humor but he is one smart motherfucker, anyway you ain't no dumbass, so tell those pre-med kids to fuck themselves, or maybe to fuck a corpse because I guess they can hit that cold pussy any time they want if they work on autopsies. But is it really worth being an obsessive asshole and working your ass off on stuff you don't care about just to hit some of that frozen poon?
No.
Yeah, I had one of my friends talking about more sucessful people in the same way, and he's a smarter man than this damn Grades, Colleges, Money 'n Office Buildings system gives him credit for. Whatever, they can make their money, but they have a limited understanding of life so it's all shit. Why do all that shit if you're gonna be pressed and unhappy for it? Because you don't know what matters.
Fuck 'em.
Posted by: icejew at November 11, 2004 07:45 PMOk, that was unecessarily long. But hopefully I won't need to say it again.
Posted by: icejew at November 11, 2004 07:46 PMI take it all back, dude, you're a fucking dumbass because you don't like cole slaw.
Posted by: icejew at November 12, 2004 12:07 AMCole slaw and pickles tend to ruin an otherwise delicious sammich. I stand by that. If you want to sog up your chips or potato wedges, go ahead, but I'm a many who enjoys the crispier things in life, especially crack cocaine in its rockiest state.
Posted by: JRuss at November 12, 2004 11:43 AMYou're an idiot.
Allow me to make this clear: You will not finish college.
Posted by: DHI at November 12, 2004 04:35 PMCole slaw is excellent, but unfortunately good cole slaw is damn near impossible to purchase. I like a nice vinegary cole slaw, none of this creamy mayonnaisey shit. You just can't buy vinegary cole slaw, so I will almost never order cole slaw, and when I do, I am always disappointed.
Posted by: Cortez at November 12, 2004 04:50 PMi agree that a mayonnaise-heavy slaw is a foolish endeavor. in my judgment, mayonnaise is a mistake in most situations. BUT: pickles are excellent, and rarely does one regret zesting up a sandwich with crisp delectable dill pickle slices.
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