You Arrogant Bastard

College is fine, here, I just always have the odd feeling of not being in the right place. Why should I have to wear shoes into the bathroom? Why should I be uncertain to sit on the futon because of what could possible be occurring on it when I am not around?

There is a niche to be found, and we all had a great dynamic going on home, whatever it was... but come on... the drinking here? These people are so excited to drink when it is so simple to do it... it is not that taboo, really.... gosh!

For me, I am solo most of the time, which I am okay with... throw me with some good songs to listen to on the way to get a sandwich. I am good. Of course, now, I realize how much I truly hate people. I mean, come on, if you are going to listen to music really loud with a huge deep bass, close your door.

Everyone thinks I am really high maintenance because I like going to sleep before 2, I don't want to fall asleep to huge deep bass music, and sorry if I don't want to sleep in a place that smells like "DOOBEES" all the time!

yeah, most of this is truer than i'd like it to be.

Very true words you got there. This college thing is definitely a load of shit. I now realize that I should have taken a couple years off and just done whatever the fuck came my way, seeing as how I'm going to a shithole school regardless of whether I went right out of high school or applied after several years of train hopping and card dealing.

We were lucky to have surrounded ourselves with amazing people in DC, but we're not in DC any more, are we?

so a lot of my experiences thus far in the mighty college life have already been explained. but i think something must be said about the fact that everybody fucking dresses up here. this may just be a concern of my unfashionable self, but i mean, how do you walk on coble stones in high heels? it defies all logic, and like those boots don't actually keep you warm enough to make up for the mini skirt...i just can't beleive that. i was under the impression that college was about wearing pajama pants to class. but this is, at least where i am, a complete lie.

Charlotte is not the first tall girl I've heard point out that kids at some or another ivy league school dress up for class more than was expected. I have not noticed this. There are three possible explanations:
1. I'm just not aware of this in general.
2. Two of my classes are filled with math and science nerds, one contains six poorly dressed people, and the other is taught by a professor so mesmerizingly British that I can't pay attention to anything else. Outside of class I listen to my Dell Digital Jukebox and ignore people.
3. Charlotte is full of shit and needs to shut the fuck up. I hate her very much.

much love for the Dell digital jukebox.

Swest, is that really what your dorm room looks like? Apparently Tufts' dorm room floors are neon-yellow painted cobblestones. All the girls wear their heels inside. I wonder if I could hire a maid to clean up my room, that'd be pretty sweet. We should all be Tremendously excited, only 15 days and we are back in the city. I have yet to return, but now realize that Im kind of glad to be going back for the first time during thanksgiving. I bet it would be a bizzare feeling to be home, and be driving past someone's house, but they arent there. So you probably end up calling them at college to give them the old, "Hey I drove by your house." Man Im fuckin excited to see yall. I hope most of you have posted up your 3 X 5 flags on the wall.

Swest, is that really what your dorm room looks like? Apparently Tufts' dorm room floors are neon-yellow painted cobblestones. All the girls wear their heels inside. I wonder if I could hire a maid to clean up my room, that'd be pretty sweet. We should all be Tremendously excited, only 15 days and we are back in the city. I have yet to return, but now realize that Im kind of glad to be going back for the first time during thanksgiving. I bet it would be a bizzare feeling to be home, and be driving past someone's house, but they arent there. So you probably end up calling them at college to give them the old, "Hey I drove by your house." Man Im fuckin excited to see yall. I hope most of you have posted up your 3 X 5 flags on the wall.

in direct response to the bull shit that cortez posted: ah... shut up with that bull shit, maign...das some bull shit.

your bathroom has a fucking carpet?

Shit man, fuck college. I want some job where I can go home and not fucking think about my job. I can just do whatever the fuck I want when I'm not doing that other shit that I have to do. And that's happiness.

Guess it depends where you are. College experiences aren't entirely mutable, even if there are fairly reliable constants. I haven't seen any high heels.

Heyy I completely forgot about this blog for a while but I'm really glad to see it's in good upkeep. So yea...seems like people are having trouble adjusting. Fuck losing old friends. I mean, it's understandable to lose a friend because your interests or personalities drifted apart. Losing friends from home is just artificial though...in high school we all had a lot of fun, we had years and years of school to find the people we like -- our niche -- and those are the people we chose to come of age with. How can you leave those people in your wake just because you met other people in college? No way. Let's fuckin road trip down Route 66 instead.

its like a bath mat, you know, but we got two of em. fucker just pissed RIGHT ON IT.

Someone say it...

It really tied the room together.

oh man that hit the spot.

I think you're in denial. Old relationships necessarily fade as the common ground that forms their foundation grows slimmer with time. Time will tell to what extent your relationships were based on choice rather than convenience; I advise you not to inhibit the formation of new bonds in naively commiting energy to the maintainance of old ones. Individuals live on in the meaning their momentary presence in your life held for you, there is nothing more precious than a fond memory. Don't spoil it. But you know actually I'm a pessimist who doesn't know much about much. You should do whatever makes you happy man.

Shut up, new kid.

like i said in the post klauso, i think there is more than enough available energy to forge new bonds while maintaining old ones for anybody who cares enough to do it. but i couldn't tell if you were talking to myself or toMAS.

"college is all about networking," right?

Lukas,

Its been two months, and apparently (from what Ive been told) we won't officially see our new college location as a second home until late sophmore year, so let us enjoy reunion.

I miss you man, and out of curiosity, do many Reed students wear moccasins? Cause Im already ahead of em.

We have barefeet moccassins shoes dylan bunny wailer and johnny cash but its nothing to write home about. Yeah, West is right, its in the blog entry, can't argue with doctrine I guess.

i'm not foolish enough to think that i will have the same group of friends for the rest of my life that i had in july, but the point i was trying to make is that i have little tolerance for people who head to college with the explicit goal of changing their personality.
it would be unnatural at this point to break off ties with old friends just as it will be unnatural 15 years from now to try to maintain ties that did not hold. you dont hear me lamenting the loss of Kevin Yousefi or anything, although he was a stand up fellow.

Liked the post a lot my dear old friend. Frankly I've been way to fucking busy here to even think about what you guys have all been thinking about. I think that as long as I'm busting my ass, I won't assimilate too much into this already medicore society out here. Look forward to seeing you all at Thanksgiving and Winter Break. JRuss --We need to get lots of Guiness with those special foam dispensing contraptions.

widgets

regardless of whether it is an explicit goal or not, personalities change to reflect their altered circumstance. An individual who attempts to subvert the malleability of his nature closes himself to the acquisition of new ideas and benefitial traits. A man who ceases to change ceases to be a man. I'll hazard it'll take much less than 15 years for all but the most diehard highschool relationships to fade. Don't sweat it though Gabe, you'll always be a twinkle in the corner of my eye.

you're making a huge mistake in assuming that only good can come with blind assimilation into any given surroundings and environs.
an open mind is a great thing to have, but...you can change and still remember who you are, what made you who you are, and why you should care. i mean, look at beck. he rules.

a healthy set of beliefs and concerns can serve as a good check against bullshit that comes your way. without this, well, then you are just the frightened boy in the stretch limo doing lines off a mirror on the way to an n*sync concert in silk suit yemen or whatever the fuck was going on that night...

perhaps this difference arises in part from our different upbringings, brotherman

Your argument rests on the mistaken presumption that your relationships are bound by some mutual set of values. Your friends are reflections of who you are, which, regardless of how strict your moral foundation is, is in constant flux. Nobody argues blind assimilation, but rather an aversion to allowing outmoded doctrines to inhibit your ability to versify your experience. Maybe upbringing has something to do with it, I don't know about this talk of strong social moores, I think people err when they take themselves too seriously. In any case I'll do what I like and you do what you like and I'm sure we won't be bothering anybody.

my friendships are bound by shared interests, goals, and yes, to a certain extent, values (however vague these terms may be in this context). i think the friendships that last the longest are the ones that are built on stuff like this. you are correct that friends are a reflection of who you are but saying that "who you are" is in constant flux is too extreme. i denounce those whose identity changes at the drop of a hat, like madonna. identity is something that should grow with you over time, building on what you used to be and bringing new "beneficial traits," like beck. my identity is a reflection of my friends as well.

i don't think i take myself too seriously- i have forever been an outspoken opponent of those who do- but i'm no nihilist, nihilist. and while we're on the subject of nihilism, fuck that shit. no true nihilist would ever call himself a nihilist so i'm sure i won't get that out of you

i mean, say what you will about the tenets of national socialism, dude, at least it's an ethos

There are individuals who are all about their self-image, and relish cultivating and altering it as someone into home decorating enjoys rearranging their room. There are individuals consumed by their minds to the point that they immerse themselves in the subjectivity of the mind. There are individuals who thrive one moment to the next on shallow thoughts strung together by lose associations in order to shield themselves from the hollowness they feel inside. Lots of ways of looking at things, and I don't condemn any of them. However you look at things, if you resist external lines of thought you're limiting your ability to soak in the human experience to its fullest in the hopes of cultivating the illusion of permanence. Its not even something you should worry about. Nihilism has nothing to do with it. I believe in many things, I simply acknowledge that these beliefs possess only the legitimacy the power I possess is able to confer upon them. As such it would hubristic of me to cling to any belief that no longer suits my prevailing circumstance. Unfortunately, entrenched habits and baseless fears inhibit my ability to fully absorb and adapt to what I encounter. But I'm working on it.

word, i think we are just disagreeing about your "prevailing circumstance" point, i think it is very possible to retain beliefs and values forever- i'm not saying that i am too stubborn to change them if it suits me, but i am also not saying that i would actively decide that they no longer matter when they aren't immediately applicable. i don't think hubris is a good word for that.

but let us end this well-met debate, friend. you still brandishin the goatee?

this just makes me miss you guys so much.

The proper scientific spelling of the word "fetus" is "foetus".

To use in a sentence: Lindsay, please flush out that foetus, so that it does not cause me to lose that bet.

I suppose they call it a soul patch or a soul line or something. Anyway it has more soul now than the goatee, and it accuentutates my philtrum which, as we all know, quantifies the strength of an individual's sexual aura.

In general, goatees are for assholes, with a few notable exceptions.

Asshair goatees?

I would refute that but obviously we're on opposite sides of a subjective argument. And I don't really care enough to debate it.

I'm pretty sure the guy who didn't sculpt his asshair into a goatee wins this argument.

i'm really sorry I didn't get my shit together enough to post a comment earlier, but here it goes.

I go to the biggest school in the country in a city that, by rights, could be any of dozens of cities like it in America. Some tall buildings. Some suburbs. Some minorities (Somalis, actually, who knew?) and the occassional concert (Gwar on the 14th at Newport...I should go...). It's an alright town. It's not New York. Nothing is New York not even New York.
So I guess I envy you guys.
But more than envy I emphathize. I had to deal with the whole extravertsallupinmyface thing too for a little while. I tried to make conversation with them and all that. I don't know what kind of manic motive I might have had then. There was certainly no rationalization that I can remember. All I remember is that I never wanted to stay in one social circle for too long, not to get attached or make committments I couldn't/wouldn't want to keep. It didn't work out very well. But this is a school of fifty thousand kids, so no one really noticed, not even me until a few weeks ago. And then there was the whole tryingtotransfer fiasco. What a load of shit. Why a load of shit? I'll explain in a moment.
Basically, there are cool people here, people somewhat like D.C. people. They're just the less social types, like Sam has observed. They tend to just like to chill in their dorms, tell jokes, and drink wine instead of down beer after beer after beer and ruminate on OSU's chances in the Rose Bowl or something...I don't even know.
So I still have a friendly relationship with those people. I mean, I don't judge them or anything. It's just like being a foreign country, sort of. ESPN is on here like CNN is in D.C. I'll just keep on saying "what'suphow'sitgoingtothem" for another year until I move the fuck out of Morrisson fucking Tower.
But so now I'm in the process of developing a Posse of people who I can feel comfortable with in a variety of situations and who I can talk about stuff that doesn't have to do with football (which is what passes for "meaning" in people's lives out here...it's sad) a subject about which I will learn only as a captive in a Kazakh prison would learn Kazakh out of bare necessity.
but yeah. we d.c. people are an odd bunch. we're an odd bunch because we don't really come from anywhere. our parents are lawyers or journalists or work for the WTO or something. these people, their parents are like foremen in factories. we're so detached from the average American mindset it's frightening. These people care about "tradition." In D.C., cynicism is our only recognizable tradition or pastime. Irony is the bread and butter of our humor. here, almost everybody will get sarcasm. i've heard tell that, in Colorado, people don't even understand that. slapstick is all that amuses them.

yeah. i'll see you cats at thanksgiving.

jesus. that was written in pieces over a twenty minute period. i didn't realize how long it was going to turn out to be.

Wet like a cherry in a bloodbath of birth.

?: just learn to enjoy shallow pointless hookups
?: for instance, 2 nights ago i hooked up with 2 girls at once
?: and i was too drunk to realize untill today that they hooked up with each other as well
?: then i woke up and took a midterm
?: i love college

just to clear things up

angelcarver92: your last comment on the Bastard is perhaps the least convincing statement ever made by you
Merced 99: the long one?
angelcarver92: no
angelcarver92: wait, did you not post that?
Merced 99: post what, the hookup thing?
angelcarver92: yeah
Merced 99: that's someother guy
angelcarver92: who?
Merced 99: it doesn't matter
Merced 99: i was just using it to illustrate one aspect of college not enjoyed (presumably) by most readers of the Bastard

for one thing, Eli, when did I start to "love" college?

i mean, my status as a tremendous pimp is long and well establish...but, to "love" college...homeboy trippin...

let's make it to fifty

I am going to

DO IT. LE SMUT OF CiM has done iT agAINS.!

That's nothing...why, back on fisticuffs, we made it past 100. And Saul and I were having a race to get the 100th post, and Chuck came in and STOLE it at the last second.

What a bastard.

Yeah Will, I agree with you about the different mindset you encounter outside of DC. People could not seem to understand sarcasm in many situations. When I first got here I had to adjust to a different level of intelligence in general. I like alot of the people here, and I dont consider my friends stupid at all, but endless games of "NFL Blitz" and heated debate for weeks about the Sox/Yankee's series can get a little tiresome. At least I can escape the kegstand mentality downtown, they have some kickass jazz places in NO.

yeah, it's really like their prodigious quantities of useful neurons are being wasted on information about sports.

sports own j00, skinny n00b

Different mindsets aren't necessarily inferior- though i don't have much contact with jocks, these rural new england boys are all about the outdoors. In general kids here are more about the subjective universe rather than the objective one DC tends to immerse itself in. They both rub me the right way.

What do you mean by "the subjective or objective universe"?

dude, people here, at the Mich., they seem to get weirded out by all the offensive material we (the DC-ites) bring to the table (202).

anyone find something on the accent of DC people?

somebody came up to me today and said "i've got it. I know who you're doing. gregory peck. you're trying to sound like gregory peck"

someone said that I sound like i'm "from the east" because i speak at the "front of my mouth." also, an acceptable construction here for "my car needs to be washed" is "my car needs washed." the english language is doing strange things in SoCentral Ohio. if this weren't weird enough, i swear i saw scrawled on a bathroom stall: "I need fucked."

at least it wasn't cary grant.

Dear god, these fucking kids can't handle sarcasm. I can't the number of times people have said "Fuck you Josh" then pushed my chair away from their table. It breaks my pathetic heart. And I can't ever be serious.
I have a disease.

And then the motherfuckers tell me that they "had a friend in DC once and they didn't talk like me, therefore I'm a liar". The also didn't believe I learned jack off when I was at Machu Pichu when I was 12. Shit. A good third of 'em didn't know what Machu Pichu is. Out of sight, man.

where else does anybody learn to jack off?

That's what I been saying, but all those fuckers do is laugh and call me a liar.

bunch of savages in this town.

"i wanna sex wamen"

tense.net!!!!!

cancer: is spreading

I don't know that college folk are all that skeptical. This chick at Tufts definitely believed me when I told her about my hacienda in Buenos Aires and that I had stolen Trevor's birthday present during the riots in Argentina.

bravo

i am inclined to believe everything i hear here, just because i assume everybody who isn't mindbogglingly brilliant/attractive has some unbelievable story to tell.

visit www.scarstories.com for my suitemate's tale. read "my scar"

I am here to say hello and you have a great site!